Sleep Deprivation

I can’t sleep. But that’s good because I’m having a sleep-deprived EEG in a few hours. I could sleep for up to four hours, but that’s not going to happen. I’m far too anxious about my first hospital visit since the pandemic started.

I’ve been anxious all weekend. In addition to being nervous about going somewhere where people have COVID-19, I’m on a course of steroids for an intractable migraine. The steroids make me more emotional and prone to “roid rage.” My partner has been very, very patient with me this past weekend!

Our cat, Candy, has also been wonderful. I swear that she knows when I need her to calm me. She’s the best unofficial emotional support cat! I’m so thankful for the two of them.

But I just want the EEG testing to be over. My new neurologist ordered it months ago. I started seeing him late last year and so far, I’ve been very impressed with him. He’s already treating my headaches and is taking over my seizure care from another neurologist. He wants to get a baseline EEG done.

This will be my third sleep-deprivation EEG. I’ve also had two ambulatory EEGs, multiple sleep study ones, and one multi-day in-patient video EEG. The most recent one was the in-patient testing, which was done in 2018. My EEGs all show that I have abnormal waves in the left temporal region of the brain. They have not captured a seizure on EEG, so the doctors cannot rule out epilepsy.

Since 2018, I’ve been on a high dose of Gabapentin and that has helped a great deal. I haven’t had a seizure-like spell since February, when I was very sick with the type A strain of the flu. I write “seizure-like” because it’s possible that what many have called seizures could actually be vasovagal events that look like a seizures. I do have vasovagal syncope and postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS), so the vasovagal idea is intriguing.

I’m hopeful that this new neurologist can get to the bottom of my headaches. This current migraine has been with me since June 18. I’ve gotten some relief with the steroids and rizatriptan, but the high heat and humidity have really been doing me. Pandemic anxiety is not helping. Our president retweeting a video of a supporter shouting “white power” is not helping.

Fingers crossed that I don’t pick up anything while I’m at the hospital. The steroids compromise my immune system and I’m already asthmatic, so I’m one of those high-risk COVID people. It’s terrifying for me. I wish people would take coronavirus seriously. Please: wear a mask and when there’s a COVID-19 vaccine, please get it. I’m selfish and want to live.